MichaelJNedell.com

For those of you who don’t know, the little town I live in has four block long closed to traffic pedestrian mall as its unofficial center. Street musicians, the occasional juggler and outdoor seating for the street’s restaurants festoon the promenade, which is replete with boulders and benches for sitting, all giving way to a fountain and a large Unitarian Church at the top, giving the street both its view and its name: Church Street.

During the winter the trees that line the walk are bright with small twinkling lights, and in the base of the fountain, turned off for the winter, sits a large, colorfully lit Christmas tree. I walk home from walk on that street every evening, and the lights, the people bustling about with packages, never fail to wipe away the memory of the days tasks and put me in a cheery, almost festive mood, and I would arrive at the house I shared with my three friends with a light heart, ready to join in the nights feast, which was usually in a state of mid-preparation.

Often, during the week preceding Christmas, the business association for Church Street had sleigh rides for the kids, the sleighs being small carts, and the carts being pulled by actual reindeer. I had to hand it to them on that one. Everyone loves a reindeer around the holiday season. Not only do they carry the carts filled with children, but they carry a long tradition of magic and wonder, and to top it all off, there cute as kittens. Now… I don’t  know how many of you have seen a reindeer, but they’re smaller than regular deer… more approachable… they have big round puppy-dog eyes and gentle sloping muzzles – small but ornate antlers – even their colorings seem warm and welcoming… rich tans and greys.

Even though I had seen that street and, after a few years, seen those animals over and over, I was impressed every time by their warm and loveable nature.

Last year, however, about three days before Christmas, my usual peaceful walk home up Church Street was disturbed by four or five police cars and a large mass of people crowded around the area near the top of the block. As much as I am a curious person, I have a tendency to avoid large groups of people and police. I like my bad news second hand. I took a quick left down a side street and went the back way home, arriving at the large house on Park Street, expecting, as usual, to my three friends and housemates in the middle of cooking dinner, which- I don’t know when it started – but it became a tradition that we enjoyed nightly – the one chance in the day to see each other.

But, as I came in the front door, took off my coat and put it on the rack, I noticed the silence where the usual sounds of feast-making would be. “Hello?!” I called out.

There was no answer. “Hellllooooo!”!? I called out again, to no avail.

“Curious and curiouser”  I said to myself, making my way into the kitchen, where the counters and stove sat unused. I went to the sink and poured myself a glass of water from the filter. As I lifted my head to drink it I saw a flash of movement out of the window that looked out on the backyard, and, squinting in the dim light, I saw Devry, my one male roommate, running around the side of the garage. “What the… “ I said to myself, Then I saw Julie and Kasha, my two female roommates run around the side of the garage too. It looked like they were carry something. They ran from the door in the side of the garage to the yard behind the garage, and then back again, and then closed the door behind them.

I put on my coat and headed out the backdoor. The windows in the big garage door were covered with cardboard and, in trying the side door I noticed it was locked. That was weird, because the lock had broke on that door over a year ago. They must have jammed something against it to keep it closed. I put my ear to it and heard the murmur of conversation. I knocked on it and called out “Hey!”

There was a sudden silence inside, and then Devry asked who it was.

“It’s Captain Mulfado of the Burlington Police Department,” I said, using a deeper official tone. “You people are in a lot of trouble.”

Inside, I heard something go clunk, and then heard some bustling sounds and then absolute silence.

I decided to end my small charade and said “Come on Devry, It’s me, Michael, who do you think it would be. Come on and let me in, what are you guys doing in there? Are we having dinner in the garage?”

The door opened a crack and Devry’s dark eyes peered out. “Michael,” he said, “You scared the crap out of me.” Then he opened the door,  reached out and pulled me inside.

When my eyes adjusted to the darkness I saw Julie and Kasha in the corner, trying, impossibly to hide four animals behind them. “What the heck are those?” I said.

“Promise you won’t be mad?” Kasha asked.

“I will not!” I said. As the older person in the house I was often seen as the ‘authority figure’, which, as anyone who knows me could tell you, is a fairly ridiculous proposition.

They moved aside and I saw the four small reindeers that were usually carting children up and down Church Street.

“You didn’t.” I said

“We did.” said Kasha

I moved closer to them and bent down to pet one of them. Its cute eyes looked into mine and it nuzzled its nose into my hand. “Awwwww. I said, aren’t you adorable?” I said, petting its soft head. It , like all of them, was still wearing its cart-toting harness. A red and green affair that ran around their shoulders (or whatever shoulders are called on reindeer).

I stood up and looked at Devry. He, along with Julie and Kasha we’re all looking at me excitedly. “Why are these reindeer in our garage?” I asked.

“They followed me home.” Kasha said

“Yeah,,” Julie said. “Can we keep them?”

“Isn’t someone going to miss them? I mean, there were five cop cars on Church Street just now. Our house, my three friends, is ACROSS THE STREET from the freaking police station, if you hadn’t noticed.”

“They’re hidden though!”  Devry said. “It was a clean job, no one followed us, and now they’re  here… hidden.”

“How did you guys steal four reindeer out from everyone’s noses?”

Devry became animated and started telling me the story, with his hands flying this way and that, how they hatched the plan after seeing the reindeer ‘forced to pull those kids’ in the cart, how Kasha and Julie created a giant diversion while Devry steered the reindeer into his truck and drove away.

“Giant diversion? What on earth could make everyone on a busy street look the other way?” I asked.

“We streaked.” Kasha said. “Me and Julie.”

“Really?”

“Yup.” said Julie. “It was cold too…. Listen Michael – these animals aren’t meant to be pulling kids in carts so their parent will buy them plastic toys… these animals are meant to be free! If taking my clothes off and running on a busy  street will free them, then I’ll do it every day.”

“Besides,” Kasha added, “we wore masks.”

“And wigs.”

One of the reindeers snorted and stomped its little hoof on the ground behind me. I turned around and watch it pee on the garage floor

I turned around and looked at my three villainous roommates. “Okay… you stole them.”

“Liberated them!” Devry said.

“You call being hidden in our garage liberating? In a couple of hours it’s going to smell pretty reindeery in here.”

“I’ve got a plan,” said Devry. “I’m going to take them to my buddy Steve’s farm down Bakersfield way. I already called him. He said they could live with the goats.”

“When? “ I asked.

“Christmas day,” he said. “Maybe the heat will be off by then. .. and I thought transporting reindeer on Christmas day won’t look as weird.”

I have to admit he had a point. A weird point… but still a point… “So…” I said. “All we have to do is hide them for three days?”

“Yup.”

I turned around and bent down to pet the reindeer nearest to me. The three other ones came and crowded around me and soon I was petting each in turn. They were making soft whinnying noises of happiness. “I only have one problem with this whole thing.” I said, to the group

“What’s that?” Devry asked.

I stood up and turned around to look at the three of them “What are we going to do about dinner?” I asked.

Kasha and Julie both smiled at me. Devry said, “What about pizza?”

One of the reindeer behind me snorted.

 

On Christmas day we all got up early and exchanged gifts among ourselves (We do a secret Santa thing – I got a scarf!) and after a nice breakfast we all went out to the garage to load the reindeer in Devry’s truck for the haul to Bakersfield. We had to get moving too, because all of us had to travel to our separate family Christmas destinations.

I have to admit, the reindeer had grown on me, and I was sad that they had to leave. We all had spent the past three nights out in the garage feeding them and petting them, and they became like pets… bigger smellier pets… but still just as warm and loveable, with their big doleful eyes…

But the headlines of the missing reindeer (the national news even picked up the story) and the prospect of jail time didn’t thrill me.

I was the last one headed out to the garage. I was trying to partake of as much coffee as I could before stepping out into the frozen world. It had snowed lightly and I was lacing up my boots when I heard my three roommates yelling for me.

“Michael – they got out – they got out.” They shouted.

I ran outside. The three of them were running this way and that.

“What happened?”

“They must have opened the door somehow and got away!” Kasha said.

“Reindeers can’t open doors.” I said.

“Well the door was open,”  Devry said, “Maybe it wasn’t closed all the way and they just walked out.”

I ran to the garage door and looked inside, hoping this was a practical joke, but sure enough the garage was empty, save the random gardening tools and the makeshift bed of hay in the corner.

I turned around and stood in the doorway and looked down. My three roommates footprints almost entirely obscured the hooveprints of the reindeer, and I had to struggle to figure out which way they went, but soon I had followed them to the driveway and saw that they led out and away from the house. Devry appeared beside me, saw me looking down at the tracks and said. “They couldn’t have got too far. These tracks look fresh.”

I agreed with him. “ Kasha! Julie! “ I shouted. “Get some rope and follow us.”  Devry and I started run/walking, following the tracks.

At the end of the driveway they went straight out into the street and were obscured by tire marks, but then reappeared in the park across the street. I quickly scanned the park, but saw nothing. The park and the surrounding streets seemed deserted.

The tracks went to the right, toward the police station. I looked at Devry. “I’ll take the rap,” he said “If it comes down to that.”

“Hopefully it won’t.” I said. We both started running toward the police station.

The tracks went through the parking lot on the side of the station, and around back, toward the narrow passageway between the police station and the stone wall that bordered the park. Beyond the wall, a cliff fell away to the waterfront. I hoped the reindeer didn’t jump over the wall and go down the cliff! We ran through the parking lot toward the corner of the building.

But as we turned the corner we saw all four reindeer grazing on some weeds that stuck though the snow at the base of the rock wall. They lifted their heads and  looked happy to see us. We stopped, catching our breath and approached them slowly. Kasha and Julie showed up behind us with the rope and without too much trouble we managed to get the rope through loops in the harnesses the reindeer were wearing. We did this as quietly as possible considering the glass windows of the police station that had us in plain site. Luckily, the offices on the other side of the glass looked empty. We started herding the reindeer back to the house, stopping at the edge of the police station to see if the coast was clear. Julie whispered “Looks good… lets go.”

We got fifteen feet before two uniform officers came out of the front door of the building and started walking toward their car… the one car parked in the parking lot we were crossing. They looked at us and we looked at them and quite nonchalantly, Devry said. “Good morning!”

“Merry Christmas!” they answered.

It took them a second to understand what we were doing, but you could see their eyes light up as they realized what was happening. They both changed their stances and slowly approached us. “Okay folks. You’re going to have to stop moving. You’re going to have to hold it right there.”

Devry looked at me and I looked at him. He was trying to give me some sort of sign by quickly raising and lowering his left eyebrow. I looked at him quizzically and he whispered. “Get between the cops and me.”

I gave him the rope that held the reindeers and moved forward. The cops froze, held out their hands and said “Hold it right there buddy.”

“Officers!” I said, “You wouldn’t believe what we found in your backyard. We were taking our morning walk, we live down the block by the way (I pointed in the opposite direction of our house) and we saw these four missing reindeer behind your police station. Boy you guys must have quite a view of the lake. Prime real estate right here.”

The cops both stared at me. One of them said. “Put  your hands above your head buddy.”

“What’s this buddy stuff?”  I said. Putting my hands above my head. “You and I both know we haven’t even been formally introduced.”

I turned around then and winked at Devry, and ran as fast as I could toward the police station. I saw, out of the corner of my eye, Devry and the reindeer start running the other way  – across the park. The cops didn’t know which way to go for a second. One of them pointed to Julie and Kasha and said, “Stay there!” And then both cops went chasing after Devry.

Soon, instead of Devry leading the reindeer, the reindeer were leading him. Maybe they were running so fast after being cooped up in our garage for three days. Devry was being tugged by the rope that was tied to their harnesses. Kasha and Julie and I gathered in a little group and watched the police chase Devry.  At first it seemed like they had a chance to catch him, but soon the reindeer were running faster and faster.

“They’re running right toward the cliff.” Julie said.

She was right. “I don’t think he can control them.” I said.

We all watched in rapt attention as the reindeer and Devry swiftly approached the cliff. Kasha grabbed onto my arm. I grabbed onto Julies arm. The policeman were shouting “Look out, Look out!” We all held our breath.

With a surge, the reindeer all jumped, clomped their hooves down once on the stone wall, then flung themselves into the air, with Devry trailing behind, hanging on to the rope for all he was worth. They soared off into the blue, their little hooves still moving. Devry was screaming at the top of his lungs. The police, like us, were stunned, and were left watching them disappear – headed East it seemed, headed into the weak winter sun. They seemed to move faster and faster. Maybe the wind was at their backs.

I came to my senses, tugged Julie and Kasha’s sleeves and we ran around the corner and ran through the back streets and snuck back into our house through the neighbor’s yard and the hole in our backyard fence. We all sat on the floor of the kitchen breathing hard and trying to process what had happened. None of us could speak..

Then there was a loud thud. It seemed to come from the roof. “What now?!” I said, and got up to see what the sound was.

But before I could get to the door Devry came in, He was holding his hands under his arms and shivering. “Soooo cold he said. Soooo cold….”

Julie went into the living room and got one of the blankets off the couch. “Here Devry, try this.” she said, wrapping the blanket around him.

“What happened?” I asked

“Where are the reindeer?” asked Kasha.

“I don’t ….know….” Devry said between shivers. “They swung once … through town … and then swung back over the house… they dropped low and slowed down enough … so that I could jump off on the roof of the porch.

“Which way did they go? Did you see?”

“No… my eyes were pretty watery from the wind and the cold. I don’t know how Santa does it. It’s freezing up there!”

“Maybe he wears a ski mask.” Kasha said.

“I’ve never seen a ski mask on him in any of the pictures.” I said.

“Maybe he has special eyes,” Julie said. “You know… or maybe he’s just really used to it, like he’s built up a tolerance.”

We all mulled that over for a while. Devry shivered under his blanket. Then Julie said. “Maybe I’ll make some tea. Does anybody want some tea?

Both Kasha and Devry said they would, but I said no thanks.

I had to go to my room and wrap some presents still. As usual, I was a little bit behind schedule.